Just for fun

Prince: Mommy – do Germans get sick more than other people?

Prince wanted to give a friend of ours a present…
Me: But we don’t really know what he likes.
Daddy: He likes sociology!
Prince: What’s sociology?!
Me: It’s about how people relate to each other.
Prince: Relate? Relate… relations! I know, we could give him Uncle Ryan!

This girl has SO - MUCH - CHARACTER,

This girl has SO – MUCH – CHARACTER,

I told the kids to tidy their room, and if they were quick they could read before bed. After a short while, this conversation ensued…
Princess: Mommy! I need to send this dress to charity.
Me: Why?
Princess: Because it’s a faster way than cleaning up.

Princess, on her way through the kitchen, noticed the dishwasher open, clean and full: “Mommy – I would be happy to unpack the dishwasher for you!
Prince, putting down his toys in the lounge: Me too!

Princess declared that: Granny Margaret, Pauline, Auntie Helen and Mommy will be the bridesmaids at my wedding. GUB [her great-uncle] will be the photo-er.

Prince, after our history read-aloud: I have more cashews than almonds. It’s like Babylon taking over Assyria!

Prince: You know, Mommy, not everything is made out of molecules.
Me: [Blank stare]
Prince: Molecules are not made out of molecules!

Prince: I want to have a 4×4 when I grow up.
Daddy: The trouble with 4x4s is that they aren’t very economical – they cost a lot to run.
Prince: Yes – but I want one so that Papa will like it when I drive him in it.

Princess:  My favourite country is Papua New Guinea. Because the first part is Papa.

Princess in the morning: I think I really can fly, you know. I think I remember flying before.
Later that the evening: I can’t fly. I tried. I just kept landing.

Princess: Isn’t it wonderful? What God has blessed us with?

Prince: I don’t think this bear can be in the Teddy Bear’s Picnic, Princess.
Princess: Prince! It’s the WIFE!

Princess:  Mommy, it’s quest time on Classic FM. I’d really like to do a quest.

Princess’s morning prayer:  “And God, thank you that you can hear our prayers even at the same time as other people might be praying. I know you have a thousand listeners. I don’t know what listeners means, but I just made it up. But you know what I mean, God.”

Princess:  Will, do you like tomatoes?
Will: Why, yes, I do!
Princess:  Oh… sorry – I ate them all.

Princess:  After eating two slices of pizza, a plateful of veggies and a blueberry muffin, my five-year-old looks at me and says, ‘Do you know what I am? A hungry Princess.’

Prince:  This house is one of heaven’s many mansions.

Life is so fun with this cool kid :)

Life is so fun with this cool kid 🙂

This rain is such a nuisance…

"This rain is such a nuisance..."

“This rain is such a nuisance…”

We’re just a little bit wet here in the UK this winter! With the recent flooding causing havoc and distress, I thought I’d lighten things up and share with you a poem my Grandmother wrote, reflecting on the days of Noah and the flood. At least things are not THAT bad here… 🙂

[NOTE: this poem may not be suitable for children due to references to the sexual immorality which was prevalent at this time in history.]

 

Après moi

Let me tell you of my neighbour –

He is such a funny man.

He doesn’t fit in.

For ever since I can remember

He’s been working on that crazy boat of his.

And he never comes to local celebrations –

He calls them sin.

He’s cold and dead and thoroughly a bore.

Why, only last month when we had a riot

– the Nephilim had come –

You do remember, don’t you? – Those little virgins –

We made them dance and then dismembered them.

Hilarious fun!

Why, that old fool! He didn’t have the sense

Even to lock himself up in his house,

To stand aside.

My dear, he tried to interfere, harangued us

Mouthing of God – and oh, my dear, the biggest laugh of all –

He cried!

And have you heard? He keeps predicting floods

He says we’ll drown!

Here we are, six days’ journey from the sea!

And although it’s getting wet down here

– This rain is such a nuisance – up the hill

It’s fairly dry, in town.

Just look at that monstrous structure!

It’s taller than the temples

And longer than the creek.

He’s closed the door now, locked his family in.

And my dear, they say he has a zoo –

We saw some creatures going two by two

Into the boat last week.

– But about that feast that we had planned for you –

An indoor orgy’s all we’ll get together

In this inclement weather…

Memories to remember

Some sweet and funny comments from my precious kids (Prince age 6/7, Princess age 4).  Enjoy!

Prince, after I kissed him goodnight, “You know, Mommy, girls are quite in style to me now.”

Princess, while watching me weigh myself: “Can I see how much MY feet cost?”

Prince: You know, Mommy, I don’t even know who I’m going to marry, yet!
Me: No, but God does. You should make sure you choose someone who loves God and will be a good mommy for your children.
Prince: Yep. I think I will go to town to choose my wife. I will ask everyone in town, ‘Do you love God?’ and if one says yes – I’ll choose her!

The beginning of Prince’s prayer on Friday morning at breakfast: “Dear God, thank you for this lovely day. Thank you that we are not having vegetables for this meal…”  (Oops!  I guess my vegetable passion hasn’t been passed on yet…)

Princess looked down at her feet while running in the park, and exclaimed, “My feet are going faster than I expected!”

Love these sweet and funny kiddos!

Love these sweet and funny kiddos!

Prince, learning about capital cities: “Which ones are the lower-case cities?”

Princess, on family night, picked up a chip from her bowl and exclaimed, “This chip is as flat as a pig!”

Walking home from swimming, the kids & I played ‘I Spy’. It was Prince’s turn:
Prince: …something beginning with ‘M’.
Mommy & Princess make some wrong guesses.
Prince: I’ll give you a clue – look all around you.
Mommy & Princess give up.
Prince: Molecules!

I asked Princess to give me a long kiss on my cheek (so that Daddy could catch it on camera). She looked at me sadly and replied, “I can’t, Mommy. Because one time when you and Daddy did a long kiss you said I couldn’t do that.”

Princess, praying before bed one night: I pray, Father Lord, that you will help me to love other people in a way to show them that I love them more than just princessey things.

Princess, writing a card at the table, spies Prince sleuthing in the hallway with a Nerf gun, and calmly comments: “Prince, I know your excellent plan is to shoot me.”

Prince, putting his arms around my neck and pulling me close:  Mommy – you’re my favourite of the physical things.

Princess came after a long and quiet period outside…
Princess:  I’ve been trying to rescue a snail from a spiders web.
Prince:  Princess, that’s very sweet.  But you should just leave it – that’s nature!  Just let nature do it’s thing.  You shouldn’t change nature.

Princess:  Who flushed that toilet?!
Prince: Me!
Princess:  Oh – I thought it was an invisible person.
Prince: There are no invisible people!
Princess: Except for the people who are…
Prince: Yes – like pick-pockets.

The things kids say

Children are such a joy! The things they say can be funny, unique, precious and insightful.  Today I just want to share with you some of the wonderful things my kids have said over the years.

Prince Quotes:

Age 5

Prince: Mommy, what’s ‘paradise’?
Me: A place where everything is perfect.
Prince: Well – this house is paradise.

An excerpt from Prince’s prayer:
Please may you spread out your wings like an angel around us that you may protect us from the bad people; that it can act like a shell.

Prince: What are those little bags made out of?
Me: A kind of plastic.
Prince: Oh, I thought so. I didn’t think of that!

Whilst watch a French cartoon: Mommy – Do French people know what they are saying?

Princess: I am a very, very beautiful person.
Prince: Princess! You are not quite a person yet!

On hearing someone mention “toiletries”, Prince looked up and said with a giggle: Toilet trees?!?!?!

Daddy: Can’t you fly?
Prince: No!
Daddy: How do you know – have you tried?
Prince: Yes

On noticing Prince picking his nose on the train…
Me: Prince, don’t do that.
Prince: Why?
Me: Because it’s not nice for other people.
Prince: But I’m not going to SHARE it with them!

Age 4

Prince, completely out of the blue: It makes sense, right?  If a kid is 8?

Prince was holding a tape measure: Mommy, how much do you inch?

Pushing his bread roll away: Here Daddy – you can have this.  The butter is embarrassing!

Princess quotes:

Age 3

Princess: I’m going to be an adult, soon.
Me: Oh, boy!
Princess: [giggles] No, Mommy! I’m a girl!

Sitting opposite her brother at the table:  I am oppositting you!

Princess: Mommy I’m REALLY hungry. I really want something that’s light green, and round.
Me: Like what?
Princess: A grape.

Trying to tell me her tights and panties are falling down: Ah! My bottom is falling apart!

Conversations with a 3 year old at 2am…
Princess: Mommy, I like water, don’t I?
Mommy: Mmm.
Princess: Water is healthy, isn’t it?
Mommy: Mmm.
Princess: It gives us exercise!
Mommy: [blank, sleepy stare]
Princess: We have energy, don’t we?
Mommy: (reluctant) Mmm.
Princess: But Uncle Ryan doesn’t have energy, does he, NO.

Daddy suggested Princess climb up and kiss Uncle Ryan. Her response was: Daddy – you do it.

Princess: “Mommy – when I think of something of my in head, I pray about it.”

Explaining a picture she has drawn:
This is a turtle. A turtle’s head. Been cut, by the people. And it’s crying with bursting tears.

Right after eating a whole slice of Daddy’s toast, drinking Daddy’s drink & drinking Mommy’s drink, at 8:40am:
Mommy, I’m hungry. Because I haven’t had lunch today.

Princess seemed to have pins & needles: Hey! My feet are bizzing!

Princess’ comment to me one morning: I wish your hair was like Micah’s, Mommy.

Age 2

Princess: I’m a Little Big!
Me: You’re a Little Big?
Princess: Yes, I’m a Little Big, and you are a Humongous Big.

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